Father Sprüche

Die 33 besten Sprüche über Father!

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  • Wenn wir morgen sterben sollten, wird die Firma, in der wir arbeiten, locker in kürzester Zeit Ersatz für uns finden. Aber die Familie, die zurück bleibt, spürt den Verlust ihr Leben lang. Dessen bewusst, widmen wir dennoch mehr Zeit unserer Arbeit, als der eigenen Familie, was doch eigentlich kein großer Einsatz ist. Ist es denn nicht so? Und, was versteckt sich hinter dem Ganzen? Wisst Ihr eigentlich, was dieses Wort FAMILY bedeutet? F - father A - and M - mother I - i L - love Y - you!

  • wie oft sieht man OMG! Father vs. MEGA SPIDER FAIL!!! oder Dieses Mädchen wird nie vergessen, sie cam wieder ausschalten! - Video. aber mal im ernst leute wenn ihr das gucken wollt das macht es bei youtube oder sonst wo bei facebook klappt es NICHT!!!!!!!!

  • Eine Engländerin ist nach der Hochzeitsnacht direkt in die Flitterwochen gefahren. Erschreckt hatte sie jedoch festgestellt, daß ihr Bräutigam nur ein Bein hat. Aufgeregt ruft sie bei ihrer Mutter an und sagt: "Mom, my husband has only one foot !!!". Worauf die Mutter antwortet: "Lucky girl ! Your father has only 2 Inches".

  • Ein Geistlicher und ein australischer Schafhirte treten bei einem Quiz gegeneinander an. Nach Ablauf der regulären Fragerunde steht es unentschieden, und der Moderator der Sendung stellt die Stichfrage, die da lautet: "Schaffen Sie es, innerhalb von 5 Minuten einen Vers auf das Wort "Timbuktu" zu reimen?" Die beiden Kandidaten ziehen sich zurück. Nach 5 Minuten tritt der Geistliche vor das Publikum und stellt sein Werk vor: "I was a father all my life, I had no children, had no wife, I read the bible through and through on my way to Timbuktu..." Das Publikum ist begeistert und wähnt den Kirchenmann bereits als den sicheren Sieger. Doch da tritt der australische Schafhirte vor und dichtet: "When Tim and I to Brisbane went, we met three ladies cheap to rent. They were three and we were two, so I booked one and Tim booked two..."

  • Ein Pilger und ein australischer Schafhirte treten bei einer Quizshow gegeneinander an. Nach Ablauf der Fragerunde steht es unentschieden und der Moderator der Sendung stellt folgende Stichfrage: Schaffen Sie es innerhalb von 5 Minuten einen Vers auf das Wort "Timbuktu" zu reimen? Nach 5 Minuten tritt der Pilger vor : " I was a father all my life, I had no children, had no wife, I read the bible through and through on my way to Timbuktu..." . Das Publikum ist begeistert, dooch da tritt der australische Schafhirte vor und dichtet : " When Tim and I to Brisbane went, we met three ladies cheap to rent. They were three and we were two, so I booked one and Tim booked two! " Wers checkt unds lustig findet drückt "gefällt mir"! :D

  • Ein Geistlicher und ein australischer Schafhirte treten bei einem Quiz gegeneinander an. Nach Ablauf der regulären Fragerunde steht es immer noch unentschieden, und der Moderator der Sendung muss eine Stichfrage stellen. Sie lautet: "Sieger ist, wer innerhalb von 5 Minuten ein orginelles, mehrzeiliges Gedicht verfasst, dass sich auf "Timbuktu" reimen muss. Die beiden Kandidaten ziehen sich zurück. Nach 5 Minuten tritt als Erster der Geistliche vor das Publikum und stellt sein Werk vor: "I was a father all my life, I had no children, had no wife, I read the bible through and through on my way to Timbuktu..." Das Publikum ist begeistert und wähnt den Kirchenmann bereits als den sicheren Sieger. Doch da tritt der australische Schafhirte vor und spricht ins Mikrofon: "When Tim and I to Brisbane went, we met three ladies cheap to rent. They were three and we were two, so I booked one and Tim booked two..."

  • Die Tastatur liegt einsam dort, weil Father in der Mother-board...

  • Ein Amerikaner, ein Russe und ein Türke beim Hammerwerfen ! Als erster nimmt der Amerikaner, 120 kg schwer und 1,95 m gross, den Hammer in die Hand, dreht sich ein paar Mal um seine Achse und wirft den Hammer 125m weit hinaus - neuer Weltrekord! ! Die Reporter stürzen sich auf den Amerikaner und fragen ihn : "Hey Yankee, WOW ! New world record ! Wie hast Du trainiert ?" Der Amerikaner antwortet mit einem Lächeln: My Granddad was Stahlbauer, my father was Stahlbauer, I am Stahlbauer, very strong !. Als nächster ist der Russe an der Reihe, 125 kg und 2,05 m gross. Er nimmt den Hammer in die Hand, dreht sich und wirft den Hammer auf 132m : wieder neuer Weltrekord ! Die Reporter eilen zu ihm und fragen: "Tovaritch, neuer Weldrekordski ! Wie trainieren ?" Mit eiserner Miene antwortet der Russe: Grossväterchen Holzarbeiter, Väterchen Holzarbeiter, ich Holzarbeiter, viel Kraft ! Zum Schluss kommt ein Türke, 55 kg und 1,60 m gross. Er kriegt den Hammer und wirft ihn auf 151 m, ohne sich auch nur ein einziges Mal zu drehen. Dritter Weltrekord an diesem Tag ! Die Reporter laufen zum Türken und meinen : "Wenn man dich so anschaut, kann man sich nur fragen, wie Du das geschafft hast ?" Der Türke anwortet :"Meine Grossvater Sozialhilfe kriegen, meineVater Sozialhilfe kriegen, ich Sozialhilfe kriegen. Meine Vater immer sagen : Bub, wenn dir wer geben Werkzeug in de Hand, dann wegschmeissen so weit wie geht !

  • When the Snow falls wunderbar And the Children happy are, When the Glatteis is on the street, And we all a Glühwein need, Then you know, es ist so weit: She is here, the Weihnachtszeit. Every Parkhaus ist besetzt, Weil die people fahren jetzt All to Kaufhof, Mediamarkt,Kriegen nearly Herzinfarkt. Shopping hirnverbrannte things And the Christmasglocke rings. Merry Christmas, merry Christmas, Hear the music, see the lights, Frohe Weihnacht, frohe Weihnacht, Merry Christmas allerseits...Mother in the kitchen bakes Schoko-,Nuss and Mandelkeks. Daddy in the Nebenraum Schmücks a Riesen- Weihnachtsbaum. Hes is hanging auf the balls, Then he from the Leiter falls... Finally the Kinderlein To the Zimmer kommen rein And es sings the Family schauerlich "Oh Christmastree!" And the jeder in the house Is packing die Geschenke aus. Merry Christmas, merry Christmas, hear the music, see the lights, Frohe Weihnacht, frohe Weihnacht, Merry Christmas allerseits...Mama find under the Tanne Eine brandnew Teflon-Pfanne,Papa gets a slips and Socken, Everybody does frohlocken. President speaks in TV, All around is Harmonie, Bis the mother in the kitchen runs: Im Ofen burns the Weihnachtsgans. And so comes the Feuerwehr With tatü, tata daher, And they bring a long, long Schlauch And a long,long Leiter auch. And they all schrei-"Wasser marsch!" Christmas is now-in the Ar***! No, mother catchs the Wihnachtsgoose, kratzing up the ärgste Russ, makes a helle Soß dazu and a cup of tea for two, puts the Braten on the table, everybody takes a gable, father speaks a Tischgebet, mit good will the goose noch geht. And the ganze große house sieht wie nach der Sintflut aus.Water hier and water da, the children rufen laut: Hurra! Dieses Jahr is Christmas cool, vom Christkind gab's 'nen swimming-pool! Merry Christmas, merry Christmas, hear the music, see the lights, Frohe Weihnacht, Frohe Weihnacht, merry Christmas allerseits.

  • If you want a lover, I'll do anything you ask me to. And if you want another kind of love I'll wear a mask for you. If you want a partner Take my hand Or if you want to strike me down in anger- Here I stand. I'm your man. If you want a boxer I will step into the ring for you. And if you want a doctor I'll examine every inch of you! If you want a driver Climb inside, Or if you want to take me for a ride- You know you can. I'm your man. And if you've got to sleep A moment on the road I will steer for you. And if you want to work the street alone I'll disappear for you! If you want a father for your child Or only wanna walk with me a while across the sand: I'm your man.

  • A: Don´t call it Schnitzel B: Alter, hol mein Hamster aus dem Toaster A:The biggest Hot Dog B: Alter, hol den Hund aus der Mikrowelle A: I had the time of my liiiiiife B:alter,du warst nur kacken A: I am your father B: alter, hör auf meine Geburtsurkunde vollzumalen A: die Todespille, muhahaha B: alter, das isn Tic Tac A: Der Todestern B: Alter , hör auf die Discokugel herum zu werfen Wenns dir gefällt LIKEN :DDDDDD

  • My Brother is over the ocean... My Sister is over the sea... My Father is over my Mother... And that's the beginning of... ME :D ♥

  • wenn ich groß bin erzähl ich meinen Kindern 'How i met your father' ;D
  • Die Fortsetzung von "How I met your mother" ist "How I met your father"

  • Dear Serena, My world is falling apart. And you're the only one who it understands. My father left my mother for a 31-years old model-a male model. I feel like screaming cause I don't have anyone to talk to. You're gone, my dad's gone and Nate's acting weird. Where are you? Why don't you call? Why did you leave without saying goodbye? You're supposed to be my best friend. I miss you so much. Love Blair gossip girl

  • If you want a lover I'll do anything you ask me to And if you want another kind of love I'll wear a mask for you If you want a partner Take my hand Or if you want to strike me down in anger Here I stand. I'm your man. If you want a boxer I will step into the ring for you And if you want a doctor I'll examine every inch of you If you want a driver Climb inside Or if you want to take me for a ride You know you can I'm your man. And if you've got to sleep A moment on the road I will steer for you And if you want to work the street alone I'll disappear for you If you want a father for your child Or only wanna walk with me a while Across the sand I'm your man

  • You are the answer for my life. I need you every day. You are the sunshine in dark nights, there's nothing I have to fear. You are the father at my side. And all I have to say: Take me... Take me... And all I have to say is: Take me... Take me... ♥

  • Money isn´t everything in life, but it keeps you in touch with your children. (said a poor father of 5 children)

  • Boy: Baby, we need to talk.Girl: Ricardo, what do you mean? Boy: Something has come up... Girl: What? What's wrong? Is it bad? Boy: I don't want to hurt you, baby. Girl: *Thinks* Oh my God, I hope he doesn't break up with me... I love him so much. Boy: Baby, are you there? Girl: Yeah, I'm here. What is so important? Boy: I'm not sure if I should say it.. Girl: Well, you already brought it up, so please just tell me. Boy: I'm leaving.. Girl: Baby, what are you talking about? I don't want you to leave me, I love you. Boy: Not like that, I mean I'm moving far away. Girl: Why? All of your family lives over here. Boy: Well, my father is sending me away to a boarding school far away. Girl: I can't believe this. Father: (Picks up the other phone, interrupts & yells furiously) ERICA! What did I tell you about talking to boys?! Get off the damn phone! (And hangs up) Boy: Wow, your father sounds really mad. Girl: You know how he gets, but anyways, I don't want you to go. Boy: Would you run away with me? Girl: Baby, you know I would, I would do anything for you, but I can't... You don't know what would happen if I did. My dad would kill me! Boy: *Sad* It's okay.. I understand, I guess.. Girl: *Thinking* I can't believe what's going on. Boy: I need to give you something tonight, because I am leaving on flight 1-80 in the morning, so I need to see you now. Girl: Okay, I will sneak out & meet you at the park. Boy: Okay, I'll meet you there in 20 minutes. (They meet at a nearby park, they both hug each other. And he gives her a note.) Boy: Here you go, this is for you. I gotta go. Girl: *Tear* (Begins to cry.) Boy: Baby, don't cry, you know I love you... But I have to go. Girl: Okay (Begins to walk away.) (They both go back home. And Erica begins to read the letter he gave her) It says... "Erica, You probably already know that I'm leaving, I knew this would be better if I wrote a letter explaining the truth about how much I care about you. The truth is, is that I never loved you, I hated you so much, you are my bitch and don't you ever forget that. I never cared about you, and never wanted to talk to you, and be around you. You really have no clue how much I hate you. Now that I'm leaving I thought you should know that I hate you, bitch. You never did the right thing, and you were never there. I didn't think I could hate someone as much as I hate you. And I never want to see you, for the rest of my life, I will never miss kissing you like before, I never want to cuddle up, how we used to. I will not miss you and that's a promise. You never had my love, and I want you to remember that. Bitch, you keep this letter because this may be the last thing you have from me. Fuck, I hate you so much. I will not talk to you soon bitch... Goodbye. - Ricardo" ( Erica begins to cry, she throws the paper in the garbage & cries for hours. ) ... A day passes, she is sad, depressed and she feels so lonely... Then she gets a phone call....Friend: How are you feeling? Girl: I just cant believe this happened.. I thought he loved me. Friend: Oh, about that. Ricardo left me a message. A few days ago. He told me to tell you to look in your jacket pocket or something... Girl: Umm.. okay. (She finds a piece of paper in the jacket.) It says: "Baby I hope you find this before you read my letter. I knew your dad might read it, so I switched a few words... Hate = Love Never = Always Bitch = Baby Will not = will .... I hope you didn't take that seriously because I love you with all my heart, and it was so hard to let you go thats why I wanted you to run away with me... -Ricardo" Girl: Oh my God! It's a letter.. Ricardo does love me! He must of slipped it into my pocket when he hugged me. I can't believe how stupid I am! ( Erica turns the TV on. ) [Breaking news] "An airplane has crashed. Over 47 young boys died, we are still searching for survivors... This is a tragedy we will never forget, this plane was flight 1-80... it was on its way to an all boys boarding school..." the Reporter says. ( She turns off the t.v. ... 3 days later, she kills herself, because of the fact that Ricardo was dead & she had nothing to live for... ) ... A day after that the phone rings. Nobody answers. It was Ricardo, he called to leave a message. "Its Ricardo, I guess you're not home so, I called to let you know that I'm alive, I missed my flight because I had to see you one last time. So, I hope your not worried. I am staying for good.

  • It is a wise father that knows his own child. (William Shakespeare)

  • "Money is not everything in life, but it keeps you in touch with your children" (said a father of 5 children)

  • I ain't a killer but don't push meRevenge is like the sweetest joy next to gettin pussy Picture paragraphs unloaded, wise words bein quoted Peeped the weakness int he rap game and sewed it Bow down, pray to God hoping that he's listenin Seein niggaz comin for me, to my diamonds, when they glistenin Now pay attention, rest in peace father I'm a ghost in these killin fields Hail Mary catch me if I go, let's go deep inside the solitary mind of a madman who screams in the dark Evil lurks, enemies, see me flee Activate my hate, let it break, to the flame Set trip, empty out my clip, never stop to aim Some say the game is all corrupted, fucked in this shit Stuck, niggaz is lucky if we bust out this shit, plusmama told me never stop until I bust a nut Fuck the world if they can't adjust

  • 2 years ago two parents went out for dinner. A few hours later, the babysitter was calling to see if she could cover up the clown statue in the kids' room, the father said Get the kids and get out of the house, we'll call the police we don't have a clown statue".The "clown statue" was actually a killer that escaped from jail. If you don't post this on 10 videos tonight the clown will be in yor bed at3:00am with a chainsaw in his hand --> ich glaub der Clown hatte zu viel zu tun - ICH lebe noch (: (: (: (:

  • A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at him. She says “Hello!”. He's rather taken aback because he can't place where he knows her from. So he says, 'Do you know me?' To which she replies, 'I think you're the father of one of my kids.' Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife and says, 'Are you the stripper from the bachelor party that I made love to on the pool table with all my buddies watching while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery?' She looks into his eyes and says calmly, "No, I'm your son's teacher.”

  • Christianity They believe that a cosmic jewish zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbollicaly eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master ao he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat an apple from a magical tree yeaah makes perfect sense!

  • My father taught me to work he did not teach me to love it. (Abraham Lincoln)

  • "What kind of father would hate his daughter if she was gay?"

  • A little boy asks his dad; "What's between mom's legs?" The father answers," Paradise." The kid asks again,"Whats between your legs?" The father replies, "The key to paradise." Then, the son says, "Piece of advice dad, change the lock. The neighbor has a copy."

  • my mother say your are a bitch what..why? ohhh..because your mother has one night stand wwith my father waht!!?? WHAT THE FUCK xD!

  • I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman. I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights. We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time. I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room. I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me. I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again. I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear. We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men. I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me. I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman. I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman. I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male. I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men. I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian. I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that. I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual. I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not have to always deal with society hating me. I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind. I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love. I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parents he loves another male. Re-post this if you believe homophobia is wrong. Please do your part to end it.

  • One of life’s greatest mysteries is how the boy who wasn’t good enough to marry your daughter can be the father of the smartest grandchild in the world." – Proverb

  • Ein Geistlicher und ein australischer Schafhirte treten bei einem Quiz gegeneinander an. Nach Ablauf der regulären Fragerunde steht es unentschieden, und der Moderator der Sendung stellt die Stichfrage, die da lautet: Schaffen Sie es, innerhalb von 5 Minuten einen Vers auf das Wort Timbuktu zu reimen? Die beiden Kandidaten ziehen sich zurück. Nach 5 Minuten tritt der Geistliche vor das Publikum und stellt sein Werk vor: I was a father all my life, had no children, had no wife. I read the bible through and through on my way to Timbuktu. Das Publikum ist begeistert und wähnt den Kirchenmann bereits als den sicheren Sieger. Doch da tritt der australische Schafhirte vor und dichtet: When Tim and I to Brisbane went we met three ladies cheap to rent. They were three but we were two so I booked one and Tim booked two.

  • Did I disappoint you or let you down? Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown? 'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun, Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won. So I took what's mine by eternal right. Took your soul out into the night. It may be over but it won't stop there, I am here for you if you'd only care. You touched my heart you touched my soul. You changed my life and all my goals. And love is blind and that I knew when, My heart was blinded by you. I've kissed your lips and held your head. Shared your dreams and shared your bed. I know you well, I know your smell. I've been addicted to you. Goodbye my lover. Goodbye my friend. You have been the one. You have been the one for me. Goodbye my lover. Goodbye my friend. You have been the one. You have been the one for me. I am a dreamer but when I wake, You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take. And as you move on, remember me, Remember us and all we used to be I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile. I've watched you sleeping for a while. I'd be the father of your child. I'd spend a lifetime with you. I know your fears and you know mine. We've had our doubts but now we're fine, And I love you, I swear that's true. I cannot live without you. Goodbye my lover. Goodbye my friend. You have been the one. You have been the one for me. Goodbye my lover. Goodbye my friend. You have been the one. You have been the one for me. And I still hold your hand in mine. In mine when I'm asleep. And I will bear my soul in time, When I'm kneeling at your feet. Goodbye my lover. Goodbye my friend. You have been the one. You have been the one for me. Goodbye my lover. Goodbye my friend. You have been the one. You have been the one for me. I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow. I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow. I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow. I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow. - Lukas Mattioli ♥

Father Sprüche als Bilder!

Viele Father Spruchbilder, tolle kostenlose Fatherbilder zum Liken, Teilen und Weiterschicken!
Wenn wir morgen sterben sollten, wird die Firma, in der wir arbeiten,
Wenn wir morgen sterben sollten,
 wird die Firma, in der wir arbeiten,
 locker in kürzester Zeit Ersatz für uns finden.
 Aber die Familie, die zurück bleibt,
 spürt den Verlust ihr Leben lang.
 Dessen bewusst, widmen wir dennoch
 mehr Zeit unserer Arbeit, als der eigenen Familie, was doch
eigentlich kein großer Einsatz ist.
 Ist es denn nicht so?
 Und, was versteckt sich hinter dem Ganzen?
 Wis...
wie oft sieht man OMG! Father vs. MEGA SPIDER FAIL!!! oder Dieses Mädche
wie oft sieht man OMG! Father vs. MEGA SPIDER FAIL!!! oder Dieses Mädchen wird nie vergessen, sie cam wieder ausschalten! - Video.
aber mal im ernst leute wenn ihr das gucken wollt das macht es bei youtube oder sonst wo
bei facebook klappt es NICHT!!!!!!!!
Eine Engländerin ist nach der Hochzeitsnacht direkt in die Flitterwochen
Eine Engländerin ist nach der Hochzeitsnacht direkt in die Flitterwochen gefahren. Erschreckt hatte sie jedoch festgestellt, daß ihr Bräutigam nur ein Bein hat. Aufgeregt ruft sie bei ihrer Mutter an und sagt: "Mom, my husband has only one foot !!!". Worauf die Mutter antwortet: "Lucky girl ! Your father has only 2 Inches".
Ein Geistlicher und ein australischer Schafhirte treten bei einem Quiz g
Ein Geistlicher und ein australischer Schafhirte treten bei einem Quiz gegeneinander an. Nach Ablauf der regulären Fragerunde steht es unentschieden, und der Moderator der Sendung stellt die Stichfrage, die da lautet: "Schaffen Sie es, innerhalb von 5 Minuten einen Vers auf das Wort "Timbuktu" zu reimen?"
Die beiden Kandidaten ziehen sich zurück. Nach 5 Minuten tritt der Geistliche vor das Publ...
Ein Pilger und ein australischer Schafhirte treten bei einer Quizshow ge
Ein Pilger und ein australischer Schafhirte treten bei einer Quizshow gegeneinander an. Nach Ablauf der Fragerunde steht es unentschieden und der Moderator der Sendung stellt folgende Stichfrage: Schaffen Sie es innerhalb von 5 Minuten einen Vers auf das Wort "Timbuktu" zu reimen?
Nach 5 Minuten tritt der Pilger vor :
" I was a father all my life, I had no children, had no wife, I read the bibl...
Ein Geistlicher und ein australischer Schafhirte treten bei einem Quiz g
Ein Geistlicher und ein australischer Schafhirte treten bei einem Quiz gegeneinander an.
Nach Ablauf der regulären Fragerunde steht es immer noch unentschieden, und der Moderator der Sendung muss eine Stichfrage stellen.
Sie lautet:
"Sieger ist, wer innerhalb von 5 Minuten ein orginelles, mehrzeiliges Gedicht verfasst, dass sich auf "Timbuktu" reimen muss.
Die beiden Kandidaten ziehen sich zurü...
Die Tastatur liegt einsam dort, weil Father in der Mother-board...
Die Tastatur liegt einsam dort, weil Father in der Mother-board...
Ein Amerikaner, ein Russe und ein Türke beim Hammerwerfen ! Als erster n
Ein Amerikaner, ein Russe und ein Türke beim Hammerwerfen !
Als erster nimmt der Amerikaner, 120 kg schwer und 1,95 m
gross, den Hammer in die Hand, dreht sich ein paar Mal um seine
Achse und wirft den Hammer 125m weit hinaus - neuer
Weltrekord! !
Die Reporter stürzen sich auf den Amerikaner und fragen ihn :
"Hey Yankee, WOW ! New world record ! Wie hast Du trainiert ?"
Der Amerikaner antwortet...
When the Snow falls wunderbar And the Children happy are, When the Glatt
When the Snow falls wunderbar
And the Children happy are,
When the Glatteis is on the street,
And we all a Glühwein need,
Then you know, es ist so weit:
She is here, the Weihnachtszeit.
Every Parkhaus ist besetzt,
Weil die people fahren jetzt
All to Kaufhof, Mediamarkt,
Kriegen nearly Herzinfarkt.
Shopping hirnverbrannte things
And the Christmasglocke rings.
Merry Christmas, merry Christmas,
He...
A: Don´t call it Schnitzel B: Alter, hol mein Hamster aus dem Toaster A:
A: Don´t call it Schnitzel
B: Alter, hol mein Hamster aus dem Toaster
A:The biggest Hot Dog
B: Alter, hol den Hund aus der Mikrowelle
A: I had the time of my liiiiiife
B:alter,du warst nur kacken
A: I am your father
B: alter, hör auf meine Geburtsurkunde vollzumalen
A: die Todespille, muhahaha
B: alter, das isn Tic Tac
A: Der Todestern
B: Alter , hör auf die Discokugel herum zu werfen
Wenns dir...
If you want a lover, I'll do anything you ask me to. And if you want ano
If you want a lover,
I'll do anything you ask me to.
And if you want another kind of love
I'll wear a mask for you.
If you want a partner
Take my hand
Or if you want to strike me down in anger-
Here I stand.
I'm your man.
If you want a boxer
I will step into the ring for you.
And if you want a doctor
I'll examine every inch of you!
If you want a driver
Climb inside,
Or if you want to take me fo...
My Brother is over the ocean... My Sister is over the sea... My Father i
My Brother is over the ocean...
My Sister is over the sea...
My Father is over my Mother...
And that's the beginning of...
ME :D ♥
wenn ich groß bin erzähl ich meinen Kindern 'How i met your father' ;D
wenn ich groß bin erzähl ich meinen Kindern 'How i met your father' ;D
Die Fortsetzung von "How I met your mother" ist "How I met your father"
Die Fortsetzung von "How I met your mother"
ist "How I met your father"
Dear Serena, My world is falling apart. And you're the only one who it u
Dear Serena,
My world is falling apart. And you're the only one who it understands. My father left my mother for a 31-years old model-a male model. I feel like screaming cause I don't have anyone to talk to. You're gone, my dad's gone and Nate's acting weird. Where are you? Why don't you call? Why did you leave without saying goodbye? You're supposed to be my best friend.  I miss you so much. L...
If you want a lover I'll do anything you ask me to And if you want anoth
If you want a lover
I'll do anything you ask me to
And if you want another kind of love
I'll wear a mask for you
If you want a partner
Take my hand
Or if you want to strike me down in anger
Here I stand.
I'm your man.
If you want a boxer
I will step into the ring for you
And if you want a doctor
I'll examine every inch of you
If you want a driver
Climb inside
Or if you want to take me for a rid...
Money isn´t everything in life, but it keeps you in touch with your chil
Money isn´t everything in life, but it keeps you in touch with your children.
(said a poor father of 5 children)
It is a wise father that knows his own child. (William Shakespeare)
It is a wise father that knows his own child. (William Shakespeare)
You are the answer for my life. I need you every day. You are the sunshi
You are the answer for my life. I need you every day. You are the sunshine in dark nights, there's nothing I have to fear. You are the father at my side. And all I have to say: Take me... Take me... And all I have to say is: Take me... Take me... ♥
Boy: Baby, we need to talk. Girl: Ricardo, what do you mean? Boy: Someth
Boy: Baby, we need to talk.
Girl: Ricardo, what do you mean?
Boy: Something has come up...
Girl: What? What's wrong? Is it bad?
Boy: I don't want to hurt you, baby.
Girl: *Thinks* Oh my God, I hope he doesn't break up with me... I love him so much.
Boy: Baby, are you there?
Girl: Yeah, I'm here. What is so important?
Boy: I'm not sure if I should say it..
Girl: Well, you already brought it up, ...
A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at
A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at him. She says “Hello!”.
He's rather taken aback because he can't place where he knows her from.
So he says, 'Do you know me?'
To which she replies, 'I think you're the father of one of my kids.'
Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife and says, 'Are you the stripper from the bachel...
"Money is not everything in life, but it keeps you in touch with your ch
"Money is not everything in life, but it keeps you in touch with your children" (said a father of 5 children)
I ain't a killer but don't push me Revenge is like the sweetest joy next
I ain't a killer but don't push me
Revenge is like the sweetest joy next to gettin pussy
Picture paragraphs unloaded, wise words bein quoted
Peeped the weakness int he rap game and sewed it
Bow down, pray to God hoping that he's listenin
Seein niggaz comin for me, to my diamonds, when they glistenin
Now pay attention, rest in peace father
I'm a ghost in these killin fields
Hail Mary catch me if...
2 years ago two parents went out for dinner. A few hours later, the ba
2 years ago two parents went out for dinner. A few hours later, the babysitter was calling to see if she could cover up the clown statue in the kids' room, the father said Get the kids and get out of the house, we'll call the police we don't have a clown statue".The "clown statue" was actually a killer that escaped from jail. If you don't post this on 10 videos tonight the c...
My father taught me to work he did not teach me to love it. (Abraham Lin
My father taught me to work he did not teach me to love it. (Abraham Lincoln)
Christianity They believe that a cosmic jewish zombie who was his own fa
Christianity
They believe that a cosmic jewish zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbollicaly eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master ao he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat an apple from a magical tree
yeaah
makes perfect sense!
"What kind of father would hate his daughter if she was gay?"
"What kind of father would hate his daughter if she was gay?"
A little boy asks his dad; "What's between mom's legs?" The father answe
A little boy asks his dad; "What's between mom's legs?" The father answers," Paradise." The kid asks again,"Whats between your legs?" The father replies, "The key to paradise." Then, the son says, "Piece of advice dad, change the lock. The neighbor has a copy."
my mother say your are a bitch what..why? ohhh..because your mother has
my mother say your are a bitch
what..why?
ohhh..because your mother has one night stand wwith my father
waht!!?? WHAT THE FUCK xD!
One of life’s greatest mysteries is how the boy who wasn’t good enough t
One of life’s greatest mysteries is how the boy who wasn’t good enough to marry your daughter can be the father of the smartest grandchild in the world." – Proverb
I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a trans
I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.
I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.
I am the foster child who wakes up wit...
Ein Geistlicher und ein australischer Schafhirte treten bei einem Quiz g
Ein Geistlicher und ein australischer Schafhirte treten bei einem Quiz gegeneinander an. Nach Ablauf der regulären Fragerunde steht es unentschieden, und der Moderator der Sendung stellt die Stichfrage, die da lautet:
Schaffen Sie es, innerhalb von 5 Minuten einen Vers auf das Wort Timbuktu zu reimen?
Die beiden Kandidaten ziehen sich zurück. Nach 5 Minuten tritt der Geistliche vor das Publikum...
Did I disappoint you or let you down? Should I be feeling guilty or let
Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and...


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